Accountability and habit tracking
Changing habits and routines can be difficult because there are so many factors contributing to the success of both. Beyond understanding habit triggers/the habit loop and the psychology behind reframing your goals (see Habits: Part I and Habits: Part II for all the info), it can also be incredibly useful to understand the way you respond to accountability.
I frequently talk about the importance of shedding external expectations, but before you can decidedly push against those voices in your head, it can be incredibly helpful to understand your relationship with external expectations.
One way to gain more insight is to use Gretchen Rubin’s The Four Tendencies Quiz. The quiz itself is free, and her additional information is what costs money. She has many additional resources on her site for using the information you gain from the quiz results. The quiz directly addresses the question, “How do I respond to expectations?”
There are four categories of accountability type: upholder, questioner, obliger, and rebel. Each has a different mixture of responses to internal and external expectations. As Gretchen Rubin writes on her website:
In a nutshell, remember:
Upholders want to know what should be done.
Questioners want justifications.
Obligers need accountability.
Rebels want freedom to do something their own way.
Knowing your tendency can help you identify whether you should announce your commitments to your friends and family or keep a journal for yourself. It won’t do you any good to have an accountability partner if you’re a rebel and don’t want to be checked in on.
A special shout out to rebels, who don’t like to be told what to do from external or internal sources. One way to handle responsibilities as a rebel is to reframe the to-do/ask into a why. When you move from an obligation into a more identity focused ask, it will feel worthwhile. For example, instead of, “I need to get this blog post done by Tuesday morning,” change that to “I want to share consistently with my online following and Tuesdays are the day where my blog posts get the most readers.” You’re reminding yourself of why it’s on the deadline that it is, and speaks to something you care about that’s not just surface level.
This is in no way sponsored or endorsed or anything like that. I simply gained value from the tendencies. If for no other purpose than understanding how other people might be considering their own world and needs. If you manage people at work, this is incredibly useful. If you have kids, this is incredibly useful. If I’m not mistaken, I was introduced to some of this language through her book, Better Than Before, though I can’t distinctly remember. I do remember that book having an impact on my outlook and recommend it.
Once you have a better understanding of how you respond best to internal pressure, external pressure, or a combo of both, that can help you determine what habit tracker you might want to use. You may not need a habit tracker at all, but for many people it can reinforce a sense of positive forward momentum and help them stick to the changes they are trying to make. There are several different kinds of habit trackers.
1) Paper journals and notebooks: You can keep your own notes and checklists, or you can invest in a pre-made journal. I have not used any pre-made journals myself, so the examples I’m including are simply options I found intriguing.
James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, has his own journal that seems very well structured and includes instructions for properly using it. It feels thorough, yet approachable. It has space for daily journaling, as well as habit tracking, so you’re taking a more holistic approach to your journaling. Given his extensive research on habits, it’s safe to say that this wasn’t just thrown together.
There are also a million and one options on Etsy (some printable), mostly featuring a big yearly calendar in a circle, or your more straightforward linear charts where you check things off. Totally cool if you want to spend the time bullet journaling and making it look neat, but as a former designer and professional organizer, even I wouldn’t bother taking the time to make it all fancy. The point isn’t the process of the journaling as much as it’s creating a reward for doing a habit. This option is great if you like pen and paper, but don’t want to spend $25 on full notebook, or don’t want to come up with a grid on your own.
2) Apps: For those of you who are either not inclined to use paper anymore, or like paper notebooks, but don’t keep up with them, an app might be the sweet spot for you. Most people are pretty glued to their phones, so having the habit tracking on your phone means you’re rarely without it.
I have mentioned it before, but I have enjoyed using the app Done. It has a clean, simple interface, but still offers all of the settings and customizations I wanted. This will keep track of good and bad habits, so you can start and stop habits. I discovered it by being nosy on a flight, the guy next to me was talking to his girlfriend about working with a coach and liking the interface a lot. He had maybe 7 habits, half of which he was trying to quit. I really admired that he was sticking to it, as it seemed like this wasn’t his tendency to commit to things/take better care of himself. I thought I’d try it out myself, and I’m happily checking meditation off my to-do list every morning. I’m the kind of person who hates having notifications, so having a little red dot on the app is enough to reinforce to me that I get shit done. There are likely other apps that work great, I really enjoy the simplicity of Done.
3) Accountability partners, friends, and coaches: This category is best partnered with The Four Tendencies above, as you’ll have a much clearer sense of whether this will help you at all. You may find that YOU are your best accountability buddy, so it’s good to know that going in. If you’re an upholder, or obliger, it can be beneficial to have an additional support system outside of yourself. It’s best not to pick people who will be too demanding, but rather who feel comfortable calling you out for not following through. Or, someone whose respect means a lot to you and you don’t want to let them down. Likewise, it’s not a great plan to set up an accountability buddy as a rebel, if you haven’t establish a clear boundary with that other person. They need to be there to say hey, two weeks ago you said you’d do this thing, but not to put pressure on you to do the thing. With pressure comes a desire to not follow through.